His disciples asked him, “rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” “Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.” – john 9:2-3
I woke up to a quiet, beautiful Sunday morning and ended the day in a blur of blood, ambulance lights and news that would change the course of our lives forever.
I am not sure why I have chosen now to share this story – maybe I was just not ready to open that door publicly inviting in streams of unwanted advice, ignorance and pity. We had slightly, posting something on social shortly after her diagnosis, but I quickly shut it again realizing it was a bad idea at the time. Being someone who strives for excellence in all I do, I was scared that people would see Mia’s birth as a failure. I know, it’s a pretty selfish thought. I had to come to the realization and ask myself who really defines excellence and success anyways? I think we’ve all seen recently that what matters most is our respect and love for others. Do you know who loves harder and cares more deeply than most?
Those with a little extra color in their lives.
Our kiddos with Trisomy 21 definitely see the world in colors and pure joy. Their perspective on life is brilliant. Now that Mia is older and we have a better idea of what life is going to be like with her, I am more willing to talk about it. We are so proud of who she is becoming and believe she will have a very successful life. We pray everyday that God places people in her path to ensure that success and so far he has! Although I am still learning, I do feel I can speak to a lot more than I could four years ago.
I have never written down or shared in writing any of my birth stories although I have thought about it many times. I have had three very different births. If I could take parts of all and put into one, it would be the perfect birth story, but of course, life doesn’t work that way.
September 25, 2016 was a day we will never forget. Yes, I know, who would ever forget the birth of their child?! It just sounds dramatic and that’s what I need to describe the events of this day. I have heard people say when someone experiences trauma our memory processing system malfunctions so that the traumatic memory isn’t remembered correctly or stored incorrectly. We may only remember fragments. I remember quite clearly, however.
I decided not to go to church that morning because I was feeling some tightness, but not enough to have Matt stay home. I never enjoyed being pregnant, but especially with Mia. I started having contractions very early with her and had to get them stopped at least twice in the hospital. I was put on bed rest for six weeks and never knew if “this was the day” even though she was my third pregnancy. As the morning went on, I decided to text Matt about the contractions, called my midwives and family. Dad picked up the older kids and mom and my sister came over. I am very close to my family, but they have never been in the room during the actual birth. This time, Matt and I, for some reason, decided to have both my mom and sister present. Later, we understood why we had this prompting from the Holy Spirit. Everyone was there for a purpose and everyone was definitely needed! With Charlee, it was Matt and the hospital staff. With Levi, it was only Matt and one of our midwives. With Mia, we have three midwives, my mom, my sister and then Matt. Everyone was all hands on deck!
Back to the calmness for a minute. Everything before Mia’s birth was perfect. We called everyone over to the house. We set up the tub on the back porch, running the hose through the window. I rested on the couch outside. It was midday by the time I got outside so the sun was in the perfect spot in our backyard. I wasn’t completely in the sun, but in it just enough to feel the warmth. I remember listening to the wind chimes and birds thinking how perfect that day was to have a baby on the back porch! I had prayed for this. When contractions started becoming stronger, I got in the tub.
I remember clearly explaining each stage of labor to Matt and my midwives. I could tell when I hit transition, I could tell when Mia dropped and I could tell the exact moment before my body started to push. It was beautiful how present I was. I started to push, reached down to grab her and she was out within a couple of pushes.
Then everything changed. Have you ever seen a shark bite on tv? When blood hits water it spreads so as to look 10 times worse then it really is! I pulled Mia up to my chest and in a split second the water turned blood red. One of our midwives grabbed Mia, pressed her hand on her belly button and quickly went into action. I had no idea what was going on. Matt was kneeling next to my ear praying and the three midwives were surrounding Mia on the couch. With my adrenaline rushing, I couldn’t process or make sense of anything going on. I just remember thinking, did I push too hard? Did I pull her out too hard? I couldn’t move, just sitting in the tub with Matt holding me tight.
I will continue in my next post, but decided to stop here for today. Don’t worry, Mia is just fine and living a happy, healthy life.
having said this, he spit on the ground, made some mud with saliva, and put it on the man’s eyes. “go,” he told him, “wash in the Pool of Siloam” (this means sent). So the man went and washed, and came home seeing.- John 9:6-7
Char says
Very lovingly written. Can’t wait for Part II
Dixie says
Thank you for sharing y’all’s story…Mia! What a beautiful daughter . . . a beautiful soul.
Tracy says
Can’t wait for the rest!! She is precious !!
Sue Meewes says
Mia is such a precious gift. I love her spirit!